Intoxicated Facebook Rant

I don't really understand people. The harder I try to understand, the less I feel that I do. What fuels the narcissism so prevalent in the world I see around me? Is it cultural or societal? The more I learn about different people from all over the world, the less I feel you can make that argument. It seems to be part of our nature. I am no saint. I am not perfect. But I self reflect often. I give without expectation. I'm self sacrificing. I sometimes come across as devoid of emotion or as some sort of asshole, but I genuinely care. Do I do these things for acceptance? Do I do them so people will love me? I'm not really sure. I find myself retreating into a more selfish version of myself. Not because my heart has changed, but because I have become bitter and resentful. Why are people's expectations of others so high? I'm not speaking about expecting someone to be enjoyable to be around or to be a good person. I'm talking about the superficial expectations that people have, even when they themselves have little to offer. What can you do for me? Will I look better if I'm associated with you? What can you give me? What is your net worth? I don't want to be associated with anyone who has these questions. I used to believe that most people were like me. That most people were kind individuals who genuinely care about who a person is and the conduct of their character. Everyone seems so concerned about What you are. And not Who you are. How does this person make me feel? Could I have conversation without effort? I used to think that women felt amorous and romantic the same way that I sometimes do. But it seems that altruism, romance, and passion doesn't exist in most women. At least not in 2015. And not in the way I always thought growing up. We grew up watching Disney, movies, and tv shows where people fell in love with who the other was. No matter how poor or rich. We watched countless stories of love developing across classes. Jack and Rose. Aladdin and Jasmine. We saw dramatic romances blossom on television like Cory and Topanga. And in my idealistic mind, I once thought that the romanticised version of romance was real. That people could love each other, friend or lover, for deeper reasons. I thought that most women wanted something like that. Many like the entertainment value of a Nicholas Sparks novel, but few actually want to live it. And it's not just romantic relationships or women. Men are equally as callous and cold. Equally as superficial. Though the objects of desire tend to be different between the sexes. Many men are just guilty of assuming that women are somehow better than us, more caring, or more loving. I'm tired of being a person who falls on my sword or looks beyond the epidermis. I just wish someone could look at me with the same x-ray vision. I wish people would stimulate my mind more. I wish people would talk more. Conviene and bond with one another. Start a conversation with a stranger. Stop judging folks on what the car they drive, the money in their bank account, and the house they have. They are indicators of many things about what a person is. They don't tell you who that person is. Enjoy someone. Enjoy their presence. Embrace them.